Why it’s important, a true story.
I’ve been photographing weddings a long time; eleven years to be exact. Given that I’m currently 34, eleven years is a considerable time frame. Photography is the only career I’ve ever pursued. It’s all I know how to do. I’ve spent ample time observing the observations of others. People ask me things like “how can you stand to shoot weddings?” and it’s not a well hidden secret that some think brides are caught up in the vanity of aesthetics or that photographers are more interested in showboating their chops than in capturing anything “real”. Yeah yeah, I know, all of it.
For years I would work like a machine, executing each shot of each event with precision and clarity. Also like a machine I was calm, cool, and collected, always. Sharing in my client’s emotions was not allowed. I was there to work, not to have feelings. Furthermore, I frequently suspected that the emotions being displayed by others were more theatrical than sincere. This was not entirely a bad thing but I think being emotionally detached from the event showed in my otherwise spot on work. In addition, I was not really committed to continuing down the path of photographing weddings. Then one day about 5 or 6 years ago I was photographing a small wedding at a beautiful resort and something different happened. I’ll come back to that.
So often life changing events sneak up on us and we don’t see them coming. We don’t know that we may be enjoying the last moments of normality, peace, contentedness or a loved one’s presence. We don’t always know that this time may be the last time. The event horizon doesn’t always have warning signs. We aren’t aware of the value in a moment until it’s over.
I was photographing a wedding. The bride’s dad was terminally ill. No one actually said that but it didn’t need saying. He could barely walk and his breathing was laborious. I shot all the photos that involved her dad in the lobby of the hotel because he could not walk outside. Everything else about the wedding was normal; beautiful bride, great location, all was as it should be. During the reception they had all the normal events; toast, cake cutting, first dance but during the father/daughter dance something happened that changed all of us who were there. The bride was dancing with her father, I forget the song but it doesn’t matter. The bride starts to cry, which is typical and then she starts to really cry, not typical. I’m watching and shooting and she is weeping, clinging to her father. I look around and see other people in the room having the same reaction and it hits me; she is saying goodbye to him. She sees that this is the moment, the moment we all say we wish we had after it’s too late. She sees it and she knows it and she’s having it right then, right in front of me. As the song continues the bride’s mom comes up and joins them followed by the rest of the family. All of them weeping, all of them embracing each other. Now even a machine like me can’t hide the fact that I’m getting caught up in the moment and I too am getting emotional. All of a sudden I realize why I’m there. Maybe they (and I) didn’t foresee it when they came in to sign a contract and put down a deposit but they were entrusting me to record this moment for them. So, tears running down my face or not, this was no time to drop the ball, to look away or to grab for a kleenex. A family was saying goodbye to their father and husband and I was there to record it for them. I must have shot 200 photos in about 3 minutes. It seemed like eternity. We were all there together, aware of what was unfolding, and seeing this time as the last of it’s kind. I think those photos were probably the last ones they had of themselves all together and before the past became the future. We were all there, in the present.
I don’t want to mention names or locations as this story is obviously very personal but I would like to thank this family for giving me a reason to see real value in what I do and for helping me to embrace wedding photography as a life long passion.
-DeAnna Dimmitt
Dry Heat Photography
This is a beautiful story, thank you so much for sharing. It’s so nice to know how committed and passionate you are about your work, and it truly shows.
DeAnna, I cannot even express to you how deeply this moved me. It’s apparent that your work is a reflection of your love for your profession. I personally feel like it’s very important to be ‘emotionally detached’ as a professional. However, even though you may not be in tears for every occasion you shoot or get goosebumps during every first-dance, the people that are viewing your photos are definitely feeling just that. Thank you for getting ‘caught up in the moment’ and thank you for capturing those beautiful, treasured, once-in-a-lifetime experiences. Your passion for what you do is something that will never seem “machine”-like. -Of course, I can’t forget to mention the fact that you’re a damn cool chick to hang around! =)
I couldn’t be more appreciative of who you are and what you do!!!
Very moving story. It brought tears to my eyes! I am glad this bride got to experience the moment with her father. Those are the memories that they will remember forever!
Wow, DeAnna. This is a beautiful story! You are wonderful at what you do, and I am sure it meant the world to the family that you captured all of the emotion that was being shared. You have a powerful job, and it is great to know that you are passionate about it! Thank you for all you and Rick do.
Thank you! That was such a great narrative. It really puts it all in perspective as to why we do what we do.